Low Point!

I am at a very low point of my life just now, one of the lowest. Our IVF failed and its broke my heart. Since then I feel like I am stuck in a rut with my life and things just keep getting worse. The ONLY good thing in my life at the moment is Campbell and my animals.

If I could, I would love to run away for a few weeks by myself and try and sort my head out, but that's impossible. 

I have been offered a new job and I felt REALLY good about it, but I may lose this due to an ex boss refusing to give me a reference. I wont even mention his name as he sickens me that much!

I really NEED and WANT this job so I can start to sort my life out, my emotions are all over the place, and then I can start to think about the future. 

Since last Monday, when I was told officially that the IVF failed (although I knew about 10 days before that),  I haven't thought about IVF or doing it again. Its not like me. I am desperate for a baby, to become a mum but I cant bear the thought of it failing again. When I am strong enough to try again, I will NOT test in the 2ww!! 

I wish I was back to Happy Me! I cant remember who that person is anymore.